Champions League Football once again. We need to go for a win tonight, nothing else will be acceptable. Team selection will be a mare with our injury list increasing at an alarming rate. But I’m gonna tell Wenger what to do… are you listening you fucking arrogant, stubborn, petanque playing, snail eating, wine drinking French git. This is what you need to do, ok, listen up. Stop the tippy, tappy short passes that get us nowhere. Control the midfield and make long ball passes up to the forwards. None of this pissing about on the half way line and losing possession. When being pressed get the defenders to hoof the fucking ball into row Z. Oi, pay a-fucking-tention, stop thinking about tonights cordon bleu meal with the missus and sit up straight and listen. This is the team you should pick:
Right Mr Wenger, Campbell needs to be given a chance, he has Champions league experience and wants to make an impression so give him some playing time tonight. Chambers is our best option for defensive midfield duties, for fuck sake, you said that when you bought him so put him there. Galatasaray will come to defend, push them back into their own half and attack, attack, attack.
But will you do this Mr Wenger, will you fuck. You’re a stubborn bastard and we all know that, so you’ll do it your way but take heed, I know what I’m talking about and you will regret not taking my experienced advice. I’ve been doing this on the internet for at least 3 years so I know what I’m doing. It’s a bloody doddle my fine French friend. Every Arsenal blogger in the world knows how to do it but you, do you read all this blogging advice? Course you don’t you arrogant tosser. Just stick with your formula and don’t change a thing, we’ve got used to it. Nothing will change.
Well Mr Wenger, I know you’re not listening to me and thank fuck for that…….. you do exactly what you want Boss. It’s your team, you get paid millions for doing what you do best. I’m just some wanker supporter who thinks I know better than you. Lets get a result tonight in whatever fashion you deem best. I’ll leave it up to you and I’ll just open a bottle of wine, watch the match on TV and criticise everything you do. But no matter what the result is, I will still be supporting you and the Gunners tomorrow.