Arsenal…. no fight, no passion and no fucking bollocks!

For a team with a very good chance to win their first Premier League title in 12 years we showed very little spirit against a depleted Man United who basically fielded a team of teenagers.

What’s gone wrong? Why did we look so ordinary? What the fuck has happened to Sanchez?

Where is our normal fluid accurate passing and why are we slowing the game down so much by passing the ball backwards all the fucking time?

These are major questions that I want to see answered, either with a statement by Wenger or some better performances in our remaining games.

I’ve never really been a Wenger out supporter but my fucking patience is being severely tested after our recent run of results. No one is pulling their weight and Wenger just makes his normal comments that we’ve all heard before, “.. don’t doubt this”…. and “you can’t question that”.

Well yes Mr ‘fucking’ Wenger, we are questioning this and we are questioning that, yesterdays performance lacked so many things and the buck ultimately stops with you.

Furthermore Mr Wenger, perhaps you haven’t noticed but the Spervs from N17 could possibly finish above us or fucking worse, win the fucking title. Have you no sense of North London pride? Of being in charge of the greatest team North London has ever seen?

Mr Wenger, I think you need to consider what will happen to you if there is no St Totteringham Day this season, things could get rather heated and nasty. If you love the Arsenal as we fans do then things need to be turned around fairly sharpish, you need to get your boys performing to a higher standard before we travel to the shadowlands next weekend. You have one game on Wednesday against Swansea to make sure they have passion and fight in their balls before what is probably going to be the most important game of the season.

We may be losing our battle to win the league title but that’s irrelevant, what is most vital is that we go to Shite Fart Lane and beat those scumbags and stop them from winning the league and from finishing above us….. now is the time Mr Wenger, to stand up and be counted, to show us that you too have the bollocks when it comes to a fight, to show us that you are…………… ARSENAL.

 

 

Man Utd v Arsenal…. another MWG?

These Must Win Games are becoming boring….. but I suppose as we are currently in contention to win the English Premier League, every single one from now until the middle of May will be the same. The  Arsenal do not have a good PL track record at Old Trafford in recent times, in fact, we haven’t won there since 2006, lost 6, drawn 2. We did however, beat them on their ground last season in the FA Cup. It’s unbelievable that in our last 23 league games at OT, we have only scored more than once on one occasion, and that was our 8-2 defeat in 2011.

So what do all those stats mean for todays game? Fuck all…. that’s what they mean.

We go there with a strong first eleven and they are having an injury crisis, they could be without De Gea and we will have Cech, they could be without Smalling and we will have Koscielny, they could be without Martial and we will have Welbeck. However, they are coming into the game after a convincing win against Midgetland ( please, no laughter in the audience) in the Europa League and we play the game after losing to Barca in the Champions League.

So what does all that mean for todays game? Fuck all…. that’s what it means!

Todays game is not linked to any of that statistical crap and we all know it, todays game is linked to just one thing….. which team plays the fucking best and which team scores the most fucking goals.

Team wise I expect Wenger to field the strongest eleven, tactics wise I expect Wenger to play attacking, possession based beautiful football which will tear through the United defence like a hot knife through butter. I expect Wenger to change tactics if necessary and to make the right substitutions to improve our chance of winning.

So what do my opinions and expectations mean for todays game? Fuck all…. that’s what they mean!

Todays game is not linked to my fantasy opinion and high expectations, todays game is linked to Arséne Wenger and the team that play, if they have the bollocks to go to Old Trafford and win, if they put all recent results against our opponents out of their minds and play the type of football we know they can play, then the 3 points will be ours and we will stay in the race, just two points behind those ‘wanna be’s’ who are currently first and more importantly, still level with the Spervs! (if they beat the Swans)

So what does todays post have to do with todays game….. Fuck all, that’s what!

What I write is all a load of fucking bollocks just to make me think that on occasion I can be clever and intelligent like people on other blogs. To keep you small group of bloggers supplied with a discussion topic…. which you bastards very rarely discuss. So what will be todays result….. how the fuck do I know, but I’ll make a wild guess just in case I get it right and then you can all chorus, “You clever fucking bastard NB69…. you got the score correct”.

Therefore, I feel in my bladder that we will win 3 – 1 today…. it means fuck all really. I don’t care what the fucking score is as long as we have more goals than them, I’ll still be riveted to the PC screen at 15h 05 French time, screaming my fucking head off, willing the boys to get a goal and put the game to bed, hoping that the ref is unbiased and treats both teams equally and that when the final whistle is blown…. we leave Manchester with three points in our pocket.

Come on you Fucking Gunners.

My DNA is called ARSENAL..

 

We all have blood running through our veins; I’m just the same with the exception that

my red and white cells equal Arsenal. You see Arsenal is as much a part of me as my

blood – we are totally inseparable, one without the other is simply impossible.

My family ties with Arsenal go back to 1913 (over a century) when my maternal

Grandfather witnessed the first game at Highbury. I have no idea if he was already an

Arsenal fan but there was never any doubt in his later years – he was close to FANatical.

He lived on Stavordale Road and was a local coalman, a big strong man standing six feet

five inches tall, arms like tree trunks, with coal dust permanently embedded in his face,

an imposing man and someone to be feared.

On match days Stavordale Road became a parking lot and Grandpa saw this as a source

of revenue. When a car parked he would be there to open the car door and greet the

driver, he would place his hand, heavily, on the drivers shoulder and say – “hey mate, if

you give me a bob (shilling) I’ll make sure that nothing bad happens to your car” the

driver would look into his coal grained face and then down at his hob nailed boots and

quickly cough up a bob. The fear factor (what Grandpa might do to his car if he said no)

rarely failed. When the street was full he’d zip up to the Drayton Arms and down a few

pints of brown and mild then trot up the hill to Highbury to watch his beloved Gunners –

he was very wise in the use of his” bob’s”.

As a kid I would stand on Avenell Road and hear the ooh’s and aah’s and roars coming

out of Highbury and I just yearned to get in to see a game, Grandpa indoctrinated me at

the age of ten, Nov. 22nd 1947, Arsenal vs Huddersfield Town and I found my DNA.

My paternal Grandfather, who lived on Caledonian Road, was equally FANatical our

combined family was huge I had eighteen uncles and forty six male cousins, all Arsenal

fans, well except for four sad souls who were Spuds supporters.

To say that we lived and breathed Arsenal is a monumental understatement, family

occasions were dominated by Arsenal dialogue, before Sunday dinner the men would all

go up the pub and we kids would stand outside listening to all of the Arsenal banter and

waiting for our bags of Smith’s crisps, with the blue twist of salt and bottles of Tizer.

I really had no other choice than to become an Arsenal supporter and I’m happy to say

that it has remained as a dominant part of my life, so much so that all family/business and

social functions are scheduled around Arsenal games.

So you see my DNA is also known as a….Dysfunction Named Arsenal.

Not that I’m complaining.

Written by GunnerN5

Arsenal got Barca’d!

 

WE LOST…….

end.

Arsenal v Hull… sometimes it happens!

A brick wall is a fucking brick wall…. how can you get through it? Perhaps Steve could do it with the Kango he used to demolish Leeds Castle.

Hull City came to the Emirates with one thing in mind, defend  and go home with a draw, sometimes a team can perform beyond their normal capabilities against a better side and this is what happened yesterday. I don’t think we could have asked more from our boys, they performed admirably and  the eleven shots they had on target would normally have given us a goal tally of at least 2 or 3, but on this occasion they were saved by a keeper on top form.

We had nearly 70% possession and 24 attempts on goal, some of those shots were wayward and on another day would have gone in, it just wasn’t our day. The Tigers were tigerish in their defending and for most of the game had nine or ten players packing their defence, not a lot you can do about that tactic in my opinion.

There were also two clear penalty appeals turned down by Dean, that was expected when it was announced he would be the referee for the game. At the end of the day we had a brick wall to try and get through and a ref who wasn’t going to do us any favours.

The only way I can look at it is to give credit to Hull for the way they fought tooth and nail for the result but don’t blame the Arsenal for failing to win the game, it wouldn’t be fair  on our boys. There were a couple of outstanding performances from Gibbo, and Elneny in particular, the Egyptian fits into our midfield similar to Cazorla, he controlled and distributed, tackled and won the ball back and overall, had a very good game.

Welbeck and Theo both had good games and on another day would have been on the score sheet. The only question mark I had was Sanchez when he came on, he seems to have lost some of his sparkle since his injury, he was wasteful and failed to make an impact. Perhaps we’ve become used to his normal game and therefore, there is a larger contrast when he has a bad day. I hope he finds his usual zest soon.

Anyway, that game has to be put behind us, we didn’t lose and we have a chance to put it right in the replay. The team now have to focus on Tuesdays game against Barca, which will be much more open and allow us to play our normal attacking style.

The replay will add to our already busy schedule but I’ve looked at the fixtures and I think the game which will be moved is Swansea at home, so it won’t be a major upheaval.

Therefore, I say to all those who may be disappointed about yesterday, don’t blame the boys in red, but instead, praise Hull City for sticking rigidly to a tactic and gaining a commendable result.

Bring on Barcelona…..

 

 

Arsenal vs Hull City….. again!

Hull City again, the third time in three years…. is it an omen that we are about to win the FA Cup for a third consecutive time? and in the process making English football history.

Not sure about anyone else but as a Londoner I pronounce Hull like ‘Hole’….. which is quite apt really because I’ve been there a couple of times and it’s a shit-hole. Apparently, despite this, Hull is to be named the 2017 UK City of Culture….. the mind boggles!

Hull City AFC are nicknamed the Tigers, currently in the Championship but looking likely to gain promotion to the PL. Their highest achievement was in 2014 when they played us in the FA Cup final and gave us a bit of a scare by quickly going 2-0 up, eventually loosing 3-2 in extra time. Remember Santis’ superb free kick?

This season they are doing well in the division below us and will not be a pushover, expect them to give us a good game and consequently, should not be taken lightly. Even Wenger said this week that they are like a Premier League team.

So last weekend we went Fox hunting and this week we are hunting Tigers, we’re on quite a safari at the moment. I expect some rotation for todays game, it’s been mentioned that Ospina will deputise for Cech and perhaps Gibbs, Chambers, Welbeck and Elneny will be included in the starting eleven. But I would hope that’s the extent of any changes. But one eye will be on the midweek game against Barcelona, where we will need our strongest side.

Personally, I’m looking forward to Welbeck starting with the Egyptian, could be an excellent combination. Koscielny has been deemed fit to play so perhaps the BFG will be rested and Chambers will step in. Perhaps we’ll also get a glimpse of Iwobi.

We do have a strong side at the moment with people coming back from injury, I don’t see us losing this game but it will be a tough one.

Unfortunately, I won’t be able to watch the game due to a work commitment, but will try to get regular updates.

Come on you fucking Gunners.

 

 

 

The SoreArse Soapbox.

I started to write this the other day when news filtered out of Arsenal HQ that Gabriel, injured with a hammy, went to Brazil for his treatment. What the fuck? Has it not been mentioned that the Arsenal have some of the best physios and doctors in  the English Premier League, if not in the world? Has it not been mentioned that we have a state of the art treatment and rehabilitation centre?

So why the fuck was he sent back to Brazil for treatment? Was it a little bit of voodoo magic, string up a chicken and cut its throat, spread the blood on Paul Easters’ bits that were painful, make a few chants and dance the pongo? Or was it a mud bath in the Amazon, with pigmies blowing darts from their blow pipes to see who could hit his hamstring?

Perhaps they had a big fat Momma witchdoctor in Sao Paulo, who chucked a few goats bones on to a stone floor and predicted that he would be fit again in two weeks?

He looked like this for a week

It just shocked me that he had to go there for treatment, does it say something about our medical center? What was better over there that we couldn’t do here? More worrying thing however, is did he recover quicker from visiting a voodoo doctor rather than staying at London Colney?

Perhaps he had to give up two ounces of his ‘Baby Gravy’ as in this scene….

I really can’t understand it….. did anyone else see the news, and if so, what did you make of it?

Welbeck is back… will he be our hero?

A month ago I made a post which doubted whether Danny would return this season, I sincerely thought that Wenger would once again say there had been a set back in his rehabilitation and he would be out for another couple of months. Well I was wrong, he returned against Leicester, played 10 minutes and scored the winning goal.

Should we get excited? Was a ten minute cameo enough to assess whether he is ready to compete for a full 90 minutes? Should the French Poof be concerned about his place in the side?

I still have a few questions about Welbys’ ability to stay injury free, he suffered a serious knee injury in April after a very good start, notably a hat trick against Galatasary and the winning goal against his former club in  the FA Cup.

For me he would be our first choice CF if he can stay off the treatment table. In my eyes he is a step up from Giroud and Walcott. An all round typical striker with similar attributes to Giroud but with a smattering of Theos’ pace. He also knows where the goal is, which will be vital in the run in to the title.

Furthermore, after his time out injured he comes back fresh and raring to go, something that seriously has to be considered when Wenger pick the team.

He’ll probably get 70 minutes against Hull on Saturday to prove his level of fitness and to assess his goal scoring potential. If he is picked and  does well, the Horny Frenchman and the ‘Nice guy’ Englishman will undoubtedly be concerned for their places in the starting eleven. That will only be a good thing, to have three strikers fighting for a place will add an edge to their game.

I can only see good coming from Dannys’ return, competition for places and an eagerness from the three of them to show what they can do.

So will Danny boy be our hero and take us over the line in first place with a hat-full of goals? A resounding yes from me…… he has the ability. We just need to keep him away from the treatment room.

Who watching the game last Sunday didn’t go berserk when this went in:

Let’s hope he gives us more of those moments over the next few months, I would be a very happy Gooner if he does.

Arsenal…. the title race is on!

Despite a dodgy ref, a dubious penalty decision, Leicester players fouling without sanction and 10 foxes defending with their lives, we got a well deserved win yesterday with two heroes coming off the bench and moving us to within two points of the leaders.

It was a game which had me on the edge of my seat for the whole ninety-five minutes, often screaming and shouting at the screen, watching us miss chances that should have been put away, of dominant possession and a referee who had lost the plot.

However, three points is three points and it was needed at this stage in the season to keep our hopes alive. It was great to see Welbeck back on the pitch and his last second goal sent me running, jumping and screaming around the room. It was as if we’d won the Cup final.

What I witnessed was generally a well played game by us, ok, we missed some clear goal scoring opportunities but overall, we played well. My only worry was Sanchez, didn’t have a good game from what I saw and he often dribbled the ball into trouble, eventually losing possession. Perhaps he was trying too hard to win the game single-handedly? But I was disappointed to see him like that.

Despite all the mind games from Ranieri about them not being under pressure, in the first half Leicester definitely looked nervous at times. Will the pressure on them now take it’s toll in lost points in the next few games? If it does then the title race could be between us and the Spervs…. which would make it even more vital that we win the fucking thing and keep them below us.

We now have a busy schedule ahead, Hull in the FA Cup, then Barca at the Emirates and then Man United away. There are rumours today that Maureen could be appointed before our game at Old Trafford, that would be fucking typical, that we get to have to play that cunt and his mind games. However, I don’t think he’ll have enough time to do something positive with another mediocre team.

So we are still in it, but still a way to go and two more crucial games away to City and the N17 shadow dwellers. It’s going to be a bumpy ride but yesterdays game would have instilled some much needed confidence in the team and we have Danny boy back….. could he make the difference?

 

The Arsenal go Fox hunting…

Whoever is saying todays games are not crucial to who wins the Premier League this season is in denial. We entertain Leicester whilst the cuntz from N17 travel to the blue side of Manchester, the top four teams. Two vital games which could be the deciding factor as to what team finishes  victorious in May.

The Foxes have proved that they are capable and should not be taken lightly.  They are a force to be reckoned with and don’t seem to be under any pressure, in fact they are on a win-win situation, nobody will blame them if they fail to win the title but if they do win it, it will be a fairytale and the whole English footballing world will be shouting their praises.

We on the other hand, will be criticised throughout the land if we don’t have top place come May, because we have a class group of players, world class, and we should have no excuses if we fail. Therefore, todays game is crucial, we just have to win.

Elemental to a success today will be stopping Vardy, the fox in the box, and Mahrez in midfield. Both have shown to be of a high quality this season.

We can make a statement today, if Leicester play an open game we’ll have a chance to play our attacking and attractive football. We can go withing two points of the top and hope that Man City and the Spervs draw later today.

Come on you fucking Gunners……..